When naming your baby, one fear may be that your child will grow up hating the name you choose. Relax. Psychological studies consistently show that happy, well adjusted people who like themselves also tend to like their names, no matter what they are and even if it takes a while.

Gertrude, for example, is commonly disliked by many children. One writer named Ann Bayer confessed in Seventeen magazine several years ago that as a little girl she absolutely abhorred her middle name Gertrude: “when I confided it to anyone ,the reaction was always the same :as screech of horror followed by giggles followed by a sympathetic glance and then a final snort of amusement.” But as this woman grew up and came to fully appreciate her own uniqueness, she also grew to like her middle name. She writes, “I can ‘t say that I’m crazy about its original German meaning ”spear maiden” but the name has a certain headstrongness, a Kind of I’m - Gertrude - wanna – make – something- of – it quality that appeals to me. Whenever I write a story I always name the heroine Gertrude. It has become my hallmark, a code word for the part of me that’s most unique.”

It’s generally best not to inflict a humorous name on a child. Calling twins Pet and Repeat might be amusing at first, but the joke soon grows stale. Likewise, rhyming names such as Mary Perry or Ronson Johnson may make a child the butt of jokes at school. Still, even an odd name won’t necessarily cause a child to want to change it. Until his death in the 1950s, a Wisconsin man named Oofty Goofty Bowman (after a circus clown) insisted he always liked his name and never tried to conceal it by using initials.

Many children (especially teen-age girls) go through a stage when they dislike their name, no matter it is.

Girls named Tia and Krishna want more ordinary names; while those called Sara and Emily wish their names were more exotic. Though parents sometimes worry when their daughter suddenly wants to change her name, psychologist say this may actually be a sign of healthy growth: The adolescent is developing a strong, unique personal identity and part of this evolving independence may involve considering a whole new name.

Most kids, once they get through their rebellious teen- age years, settle down and come to love the names they once detested. But for those who don’t it’s fairly easy in most states to change one’s name by simply going to court. About 50,000 Americans change their names each year. Why some people choose the new names they do, however, often remains a mystery. A clerk in the New York State Supreme Court tells of a Mr. Murphy who had grown weary of his last name, which he found “too Irish and too common.” So he petitioned the court to change his name - to Kelly.

Posted in Psychology

Another old naming rule that’s now gone, thanks to recent research, is the notion that your Child’s name should clearly denote his or her sex. The old idea was that if you gave your child a sexually ambiguous name (like Robin, Lee, Dana, or Harper), he or she would have trouble establishing a sexual identity and would likely suffer serious psychological problems (a phenomenon Known as “the boy – named- Sue syndrome”).

This notion has now been discarded. In his carefully controlled studies of Wesleyan University students reported in 1980, Dr Zweigenhaft compared students with sexually ambiguous or misleading names (such as Dana, Leslie, and Ronnie) with students whose names were decidedly masculine or feminine. All the students had taken the California Psychological Inventory (CPI), which tests psychological health on eighteen scales. Students with unisex names were just as psychologically health as students whose names clearly denote their sex. As matter of fact, girls with sexually ambiguous names scored higher than other girls on “capacity for status,” whereas boys with unisex names scored higher than other boys on the “well – being” and “good impression” scales. Dr. Zweigenhaft’s conclusions are very clear. He writes, “There is no evidence in these data to support the dire predictions for the “boy- named – Sue syndrome.” Case closed.

What about naming your son after his father with “Jr.” attached? Research has generally shown this isn’t such a good Idea. Most studies have found boys intensely dislike being given their father’s name (although Dr. Busse did find in one study that boys named for their fathers liked their names and also got along well with other boys). Dr.Zweigenhaft found in his 1980 studies that juniors scored significantly lower than other boys on a number of psychological measures, including capacity for status, well- being, responsibility, tolerance, and intellectual efficiency.

It’s important to remember, of course, that such findings are for all juniors on average. Any one specific junior (Yours, for example) may actually score way above other boys in these areas. If you do name a son junior, the most important thing is to make sure your son has a sense of individuality. Thus, if a boy is named Thomas Jones, Jr., it’s advisable to give him a distinctive nickname (like T.J. for example) to emphasize the fact that he’s still unique and special.

Intriguingly, when Dr. Zweigenhaft looked at the psychological scores of boys named after their fathers, but whose junior status was designated with Roman numerals rather Jr., (as in John Smith II or John Rockefeller ), he found these boys were as well adjusted as boys not named for their fathers. Dr Zwegenhaft speculates that a boy with aII, III, or IV after his name may see himself as one link in a long chain of respected, admirable high achievers, and may therefore see himself as quite special. “In contrast,” he writes, “the person with Jr. attached to his name may or may not be part of a long line. His title reminds us, and him, that he is younger, most likely smaller (at least for the first 15 years of his life) and lesser in status than the real thing, the person he was named after.”

When you examine all the latest psychological findings about names, one fact becomes obvious: you needn’t worry about making some dreadful blunder when naming your baby. The latest scientific research has shown that choosing a name for your child is a lot less perilous and hence a lot more fun than psychologists of the past believed.

Posted in Psychology

Thirty to forty years ago, scientists thought an unusual, Distinctive name would make a child unpopular in school and harm her emotional development. It was thought that children with uncommon names like Riza or Blair would have fewer friends than children with ordinary names like Susan or David. Some experts even insisted an unusual name alone would launch a child on path of crime!

Happily, these silly notions have gone by the wayside. The most recent research reveals that, far from being a handicap, an unusual name can be quite an advantage. Clinical psychologist C.R. Snyder, co- author of Uniqueness: The Human Pursuit of Difference argues that a child’s name is one of his or her “uniqueness” traits. “To have self – esteem,” Dr. Snyder says, “all human beings have to feel special. If you make people too similar to others, you threaten their uniqueness and their self – esteem will take a nose–dive.” Dr. Snyder points out that any name helps a child establish a unique identity. But a distinctive name that makes a child stand out a little more from the crowd may actually help the child in his or her struggle to feel individual and special.

Sports heroes, singers, and film stars have long recognized the publicity value of having a distinctive name. Would Yogi Berra have been as memorable on and off the baseball diamond if he’d gone by his real name__ Lawrence Peter Berra? Would Cary Grant have been a sex symbol as Archie Leach? Or would Bo Derek have rated a “10” had she stayed Mary Cathleen Collins? Probably not.

Unusual names may be especially advantageous to a child born in the upper – middle or upper class. As Guilford College psychologist Richard Zwegenhaft notes in a Journal of Social Psychology article, a child already privileged by birth may see his distinctive name as just another positive way he stands out. Research on upper- class children who go on to fulfill their promise of birth strongly supports this theory. To see whether an unusual name had any effect on later success, Dr. Zweigenhaft chose 436 male names at random from The Social Register, which has been called the “best guide to the membership of the national upper class.” Half the men had unusual first names like Urie and Cornell, whereas the other half had common ones like William and John. Of those thirty men who actually went on to become listed in Who’s Who, twenty – three or a whopping 77 percent came from the group with unusual names.

Past studies showed that children with unusual names did worse on IQ tests and had lower self – esteem. Again, more recent studies have not born this out. Indeed, one study reported in The Journal of Social Psychology found unusually named college women actually scored higher on many variables, including capacity for status, sociability, social presence, and self – acceptance, than did women with ordinary names.

Nor should you worry that giving your child an unusual name will make her unpopular. One often – reported 1966 study did suggest that kids with uncommon names might be less popular with their peers. But that study included only fifty- nine children (all Jewish) who knew one another. In a much more extensive study done in 1979, Dr. Busse looked at 1,548 children from many racial, ethnic, and religious backgrounds. Comparing kids with ordinary names to chose with unusual ones, he found no relation between a child’s first name and her popularity. There is simply no proof that a special, unique, or distinctive name will doom your child to a life of unpopularity.

Lest we replace the myth that an unusual name always harms a child with a new myth that an unusual name never hurts, however, we should point put that there’s a clear difference between giving a child a downright comical name like Ima Pigg or Hong Fong Dong (which is bound to provoke vicious teasing from schoolmates) and a pretty or distinctive name like Kala or Jared, which will likely just help a child feel more special.

Posted in Psychology

When reading about names, you’ll invariably read of a study done by psychologists John w. Mcdavid and Herbert Harari, which supposedly “proves” you’d better give your child a popular name if you want her to do well in school. The more you think about it, the more worrisome this pronouncement may become. After all, what exactly is a popular name? No one really knows. The fact is, name fads shift often quite dramatically from year to year.

Let’s look at this study closer to see what was actually found. MacDavid and Harari asked eighty elementary school teachers to grade short paragraphs written by fifth- and sixth- graders. The essays were all on the topic ” What I Did All Day Last Sunday.” Supposedly, the only difference in these “comparable” essays was that four names on the tests (David, Michael, Lisa, and Karen) were “popular” among the teachers, whereas the other four names ( Elmer, Hubert, Adelle, and Bertha) were ” unpopular.” Papers by Michael or David received a full grade higher than those by Elmer or Hubert. And Karen and Lisa were given a grade and a half higher than the supposedly outcast, unpopular Bertha.

But there are major problems with this study if you take it as serious “proof” (as do many authors of popular articles and books about names) that you’d better give your child a familiar, “popular,” or socially “desirable” name if you want her to do well in school.

First , one of the so-called undesirable names Adelle actually received the highest grade of all. This finding, if reported at all, is generally skipped over with the lame excuse that the teachers probably considered the name Adelle “scholarly” and “academic.” But the fact that Adelle did get a better grade than the popularly named kids leaves the often-drawn conclusion that kids with uncommon or out - of - vogue names do poorly in school open to question.

Second, what if this study which has been cited adnauseum as “proof” against unpopular names was, in fact flawed? Suppose Lisa’s essay really was subtly better in some way than Bertha’s, and Lisa’s higher grade had little, if anything, to do with her first name. Writers who report this study seldom bother to tell you that the essays were not the same. David wrote about “the store,” Michael about “Tarzan,” Elmer about “The Anniversary,” and Hubert about “Kites.” Adelle wrote about “shopping” and Lisa about “Walking the Dogs.” Bertha ’s topic was ” Planting Seeds” (hardly the liveliest subject).As researchers Louisa Seraydarian and Thomas V. Busse point out in The Journal of Psychology, not only is it possible that the essays weren’t comparable, but the teachers in the McDavid-Harari study also weren’t given any specific criteria for grading the essays. The vaguer and more unspecified a task, Drs. Seraydarian and Busse note, “the more likely it is that irrelevancies (e.g., first names) might affect the task.”

Third, to be accepted as a scientific “fact,” a study has to be reproduced and the same results found by other teams of scientists. Yet in 1981 when Drs. Seraydarian and Busse,then at Temple University, tried to duplicate the McDavid Harari findings, they couldn’t. In the Temple University study which involved 60 children’s names, 10 essays, and 180 teachers popular or unpopular names had no good or bad effects on the grades fifth-graders received. Though the children’s names were prominently displayed on the papers, many teachers later admitted they hadn’t even noticed them. In short, no psychologist can say with great certainty that you should call your little boy David or Michael (as opposed to Hubert) if you want him to do well in school. Until scientists prove that a child’s first name can seriously affect what grades he receives, it seems wisest just to choose the name you like best.

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After working hard to build her career as a lawyer, Joanne is about to have her first baby at age Thirty-five. Not content with just one book, she’s brought home armloads of books from library and has even dug out half a dozen magazine articles on how to choose the best name for her baby.

Unfortunately, the more Joanne reds, the more uncertain she feels. “Several articles say the name I choose can affect the grade my child will get in school,” Joanne says. “I don’t honestly see how a child’s name alone could affect how her teachers treat her…but, still, I do worry. Also, if my baby’s a girl, I was thinking of calling her Kayla or Shanna, but then I saw a psychologist quoted who insists unusually named kids are unpopular and have emotional problems. I don’t know. Maybe I should just listen to my mother. She wants me to call the baby Kathy or Michael.”

Joanne is hardly alone. Many thoughtful, loving parents are concerned about the psychological impact a particular name may have on their baby’s future. Clearly, our names are important to us. Scientists have observed that when you hear your own name spoken -even when you’re asleep- your brain waves become twice as active as when you hear someone else’s name. The psychologist Gordon Allport contended that a child’s name is the focal point around which he organizes his self - identity throughout life. But what does modern psychological research tell us about choosing the very best name for a baby? What are the pros and cons, for example, of giving your baby an unusual name like Shanna rather than a common one like Kathy? Can the same name you choose affect your baby’s future school grades or emotional development (as some so- called experts ominously warn)? Should you play it safe and opt for an ordinary name like Dick or Jane?

When trying to answer such complex questions, it’s not nearly enough to simply glance at findings from one or two poorly designed name studies done twenty or thirty years ago and then try to draw up guidelines for naming your baby (which is what far too many “experts” intent on drawing up hard- and - fast naming rules have done). Findings from a scientific study done in lab, while frequently interesting, don’t always translate directly and easily to hard- and - fast naming “how-to’s” in the real world. So let’s analyze the latest scientific findings about the psychology of names to see what this research tells you (if anything) about how to choose the very best name for your special baby.

Posted in Psychology